Home is getting hard to define.
January 3 - January 27
The Facts
We returned to one of the local game shops we previously visited and played some card games with one of Joey's fellow engineers. We taught him Dutch Blitz and he taught us Exploding Kittens. We rode our bikes to the game shop even though it was cold. It's too close to our apartment to necessitate driving.
On January 8, Joey turned 29. We tried Kashmir. This is the second year in a row we went out for Indian cuisine on his birthday. I kind of hope it becomes a tradition.
I can now consistently get to and from work without using a GPS. This is a big deal because I still get turned around when I'm visiting my hometown... where I lived for 23 years straight... in the same house.
A different fellow engineer treated us to Guy Fieri's Smokehouse where we were reminded that barbecue is never quite as great as we expect it to be. It was still delicious, but Joey and I are realizing we don't really like it as much as we think we do. Also, Joey is constantly comparing it to the barbecue he got back in Rouge. His all time favorites are the rib tips made by the River Rouge Band Boosters tent at Rouge days followed closely by the barbecue he ate from a guy with a big smoker stationed in front of a defunct car wash. Sorry, Mr. Fieri... although... I kind of feel like he would support this.
We made our first trip to Michigan specifically for visiting. It was short (as nearly all weekend trips are), but we were able to squeeze time in with lots of friends. To the people we didn't get a chance to see- I promise we'll be back eventually! We got coffee from our favorite spot, experienced the first big snow of Michigan winter (excellent timing on our part), and returned to Grace Baptist Church. I can better recall the feelings of this trip than the facts.
A barbecue place that comes highly recommended is Mark's Feed Store. We tried it. See comments on Guy Fieri's Smokehouse.
We also made our third trip to Book and Music Exchange. It's basically the perfect place for us. We walk in together, then look at each other and say, "See you later." He goes to the left to look at video games and I go to the right to look at books. After a while, we find each other, talk about what we discovered, make our purchases and leave. A lovely time is had by all.
Stylish is not a word that anyone would use to describe me-- nor do I care about being particularly stylish-- but based on the suggestion of my bosom friend, I decided to try Stitch Fix as a Christmas gift to myself. I am still surprised at how much I liked it. I even wrote a bunch of details about having sweaty armpits in the notes section of my profile and the stylist worked with that info. I'm getting another box next month. No mention of sweaty armpits this time so we'll see what happens. 😂
The Feelings
Having face to face conversations with friends is so much better than other forms of communication. I'm glad I was able to get a bit caught up on life in Michigan and I'm pleased that I didn't feel as left out as I was anticipating. I thought returning would be like the first time I visited home after leaving for college. I expected everything to be put on hold while I was gone and life would just wait until the next time I was in Joliet. Realizing that church events, for example, still happened without me and my friends and family were making new memories with people I'd never met was surprisingly hard. Thankfully, I remembered that life Downriver was still happening even though we weren't there and that made a big difference in my ability to enjoy our visit.
There were a couple things I noticed in each conversation I had with friends that weekend.
1. I talked about how much Joey and I are thankful for this unique launch opportunity.
2. I gushed about my how much I love my job. More on that in a moment.
For the entire drive up, I kept forgetting where we were going. Whenever we left on weekend trips during the last 5 years, we'd be heading from Michigan to our families in Ohio or Illinois. It's hard to explain what it felt like to be returning to Michigan, our home for 5+ years, but not have a house to return to. Honestly, we really like the freedom of not being officially tied down anywhere, but it was weird to go to a place that was full of routines for us just a few months ago.
So about that job of mine. I don't think I've really said much about the specifics. I'm a caregiver for people with dementia. I know I've at least mentioned that my duties involve poop (yes, I said doody). Thankfully, there's more to it than just that. I'm part waitstaff, housekeeper, personal assistant, snack provider, laundryman, comforter, entertainer, bathroom break buddy, and security. My favorite part of this job is also my favorite part of teaching: the relationships. The memory care section of the retirement home is often referred to as a "neighborhood." This is to encourage a sense of community and family. Though I don't work in someone's house, it is their home and I feel privileged to be involved in caring for them. It also doesn't hurt that my coworkers are such hard working and easygoing people.
I have a wealth of stories already-- some funny and some heartbreaking. When I'm lucky, I make observations that lead me to think about life differently. One relatively small example of that happened a few days ago. I was struggling to get a long sleeved shirt on one of my residents. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary since this resident and I have endured this struggle since my first day. It's hard to dress an adult-- especially when they can't easily communicate. This particular day, the resident's daughter was in the room with me and she told me to try putting the shirt on head first instead of arms first. She gave me a few different reasons for this that I half listened to because I was becoming exhausted from dressing her mom and a little stressed out from being watched. Also, in my head, I had perfectly good reasons for going arms first. Finally, she ended her suggestion with, "That's how mom always used to do it." At this point, I had gotten the shirt on and was ready to leave so she could work on styling her mom's hair, but that sentence changed my perspective.
The next day, I remembered the tip about putting the shirt on head first and decided it couldn't hurt to try. (I mean, who would know better how to dress her mom? Her stubborn caregiver of barely two months or her daughter of 50+ years?) You probably know where this is going, but it was SO MUCH EASIER. It was like muscle memory kicked in and she knew the routine as soon as her head was through the neck of the shirt. This is the kind of information that would be invaluable in a resident's file. Yeah, sure, go ahead and tell me about their allergies and chronic illnesses but for heaven's sake please tell me if they prefer head first or arms first next time! For future reference, I'm a arms first person. Joey is a head first person. Keep this in mind should you ever have to help dress us. I'm going to try to start working this into everyday conversations. It's something everyone can answer and I don't think there's one right way. Or maybe there is and the conversation will turn into aruthless fun debate. How do you put your shirt on???
The only thing I abhor about my job is making beds. I'd do bathroom breaks all day to avoid working with a fitted sheet.
The Requests
I guess things are starting to feel pretty normal down here. I'm so thankful that this transition hasn't been nearly as hard as basically every other transition Joey and I have been through since meeting. So this isn't a request really, but it is something you can celebrate with us!
Joey has had some very rough days at work this month. He doesn't often get a chance to completely rest since they've been calling him in on weekends too.
Even though things are pretty good, please keep praying for us-- specifically, that we continue to cautiously enjoy this experience (have I mentioned recently that we have a housekeeper?!) and that we'd meet some fellow believers.
A word from Joey: "If you want to understand my work day, follow this procedure: 1. Find wall. 2. Apply head. 3. Repeat. Also, why does it seem like all the barbecue places in Louisville are named like pet food stores?"
The Facts
We returned to one of the local game shops we previously visited and played some card games with one of Joey's fellow engineers. We taught him Dutch Blitz and he taught us Exploding Kittens. We rode our bikes to the game shop even though it was cold. It's too close to our apartment to necessitate driving.
On January 8, Joey turned 29. We tried Kashmir. This is the second year in a row we went out for Indian cuisine on his birthday. I kind of hope it becomes a tradition.
I can now consistently get to and from work without using a GPS. This is a big deal because I still get turned around when I'm visiting my hometown... where I lived for 23 years straight... in the same house.
A different fellow engineer treated us to Guy Fieri's Smokehouse where we were reminded that barbecue is never quite as great as we expect it to be. It was still delicious, but Joey and I are realizing we don't really like it as much as we think we do. Also, Joey is constantly comparing it to the barbecue he got back in Rouge. His all time favorites are the rib tips made by the River Rouge Band Boosters tent at Rouge days followed closely by the barbecue he ate from a guy with a big smoker stationed in front of a defunct car wash. Sorry, Mr. Fieri... although... I kind of feel like he would support this.
We made our first trip to Michigan specifically for visiting. It was short (as nearly all weekend trips are), but we were able to squeeze time in with lots of friends. To the people we didn't get a chance to see- I promise we'll be back eventually! We got coffee from our favorite spot, experienced the first big snow of Michigan winter (excellent timing on our part), and returned to Grace Baptist Church. I can better recall the feelings of this trip than the facts.
 |
| Nothing beats City Coffeehouse in Allen Park. |
A barbecue place that comes highly recommended is Mark's Feed Store. We tried it. See comments on Guy Fieri's Smokehouse.
We also made our third trip to Book and Music Exchange. It's basically the perfect place for us. We walk in together, then look at each other and say, "See you later." He goes to the left to look at video games and I go to the right to look at books. After a while, we find each other, talk about what we discovered, make our purchases and leave. A lovely time is had by all.
Stylish is not a word that anyone would use to describe me-- nor do I care about being particularly stylish-- but based on the suggestion of my bosom friend, I decided to try Stitch Fix as a Christmas gift to myself. I am still surprised at how much I liked it. I even wrote a bunch of details about having sweaty armpits in the notes section of my profile and the stylist worked with that info. I'm getting another box next month. No mention of sweaty armpits this time so we'll see what happens. 😂
The Feelings
Having face to face conversations with friends is so much better than other forms of communication. I'm glad I was able to get a bit caught up on life in Michigan and I'm pleased that I didn't feel as left out as I was anticipating. I thought returning would be like the first time I visited home after leaving for college. I expected everything to be put on hold while I was gone and life would just wait until the next time I was in Joliet. Realizing that church events, for example, still happened without me and my friends and family were making new memories with people I'd never met was surprisingly hard. Thankfully, I remembered that life Downriver was still happening even though we weren't there and that made a big difference in my ability to enjoy our visit.
There were a couple things I noticed in each conversation I had with friends that weekend.
1. I talked about how much Joey and I are thankful for this unique launch opportunity.
2. I gushed about my how much I love my job. More on that in a moment.
For the entire drive up, I kept forgetting where we were going. Whenever we left on weekend trips during the last 5 years, we'd be heading from Michigan to our families in Ohio or Illinois. It's hard to explain what it felt like to be returning to Michigan, our home for 5+ years, but not have a house to return to. Honestly, we really like the freedom of not being officially tied down anywhere, but it was weird to go to a place that was full of routines for us just a few months ago.
So about that job of mine. I don't think I've really said much about the specifics. I'm a caregiver for people with dementia. I know I've at least mentioned that my duties involve poop (yes, I said doody). Thankfully, there's more to it than just that. I'm part waitstaff, housekeeper, personal assistant, snack provider, laundryman, comforter, entertainer, bathroom break buddy, and security. My favorite part of this job is also my favorite part of teaching: the relationships. The memory care section of the retirement home is often referred to as a "neighborhood." This is to encourage a sense of community and family. Though I don't work in someone's house, it is their home and I feel privileged to be involved in caring for them. It also doesn't hurt that my coworkers are such hard working and easygoing people.
I have a wealth of stories already-- some funny and some heartbreaking. When I'm lucky, I make observations that lead me to think about life differently. One relatively small example of that happened a few days ago. I was struggling to get a long sleeved shirt on one of my residents. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary since this resident and I have endured this struggle since my first day. It's hard to dress an adult-- especially when they can't easily communicate. This particular day, the resident's daughter was in the room with me and she told me to try putting the shirt on head first instead of arms first. She gave me a few different reasons for this that I half listened to because I was becoming exhausted from dressing her mom and a little stressed out from being watched. Also, in my head, I had perfectly good reasons for going arms first. Finally, she ended her suggestion with, "That's how mom always used to do it." At this point, I had gotten the shirt on and was ready to leave so she could work on styling her mom's hair, but that sentence changed my perspective.
The next day, I remembered the tip about putting the shirt on head first and decided it couldn't hurt to try. (I mean, who would know better how to dress her mom? Her stubborn caregiver of barely two months or her daughter of 50+ years?) You probably know where this is going, but it was SO MUCH EASIER. It was like muscle memory kicked in and she knew the routine as soon as her head was through the neck of the shirt. This is the kind of information that would be invaluable in a resident's file. Yeah, sure, go ahead and tell me about their allergies and chronic illnesses but for heaven's sake please tell me if they prefer head first or arms first next time! For future reference, I'm a arms first person. Joey is a head first person. Keep this in mind should you ever have to help dress us. I'm going to try to start working this into everyday conversations. It's something everyone can answer and I don't think there's one right way. Or maybe there is and the conversation will turn into a
The only thing I abhor about my job is making beds. I'd do bathroom breaks all day to avoid working with a fitted sheet.
The Requests
I guess things are starting to feel pretty normal down here. I'm so thankful that this transition hasn't been nearly as hard as basically every other transition Joey and I have been through since meeting. So this isn't a request really, but it is something you can celebrate with us!
Joey has had some very rough days at work this month. He doesn't often get a chance to completely rest since they've been calling him in on weekends too.
Even though things are pretty good, please keep praying for us-- specifically, that we continue to cautiously enjoy this experience (have I mentioned recently that we have a housekeeper?!) and that we'd meet some fellow believers.
A word from Joey: "If you want to understand my work day, follow this procedure: 1. Find wall. 2. Apply head. 3. Repeat. Also, why does it seem like all the barbecue places in Louisville are named like pet food stores?"
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